Online Dating:It's a HELL no!
People are often times surprised and then super shocked to learn that I use online dating sites, and I have for quite some time now actually. Honestly, sometimes I'm still shocked at myself that after some of the crazy first and last date experiences I've experienced!
I'm really big on trying to understand WHY people are who they are, and there's no better subject to study than myself. Ironically enough, a conversation I had with an uber driver led me to take a look at why I online date, especially when if you ask any of my friends they'll tell you, that I make new friends easily and am always meeting new people.
I started online dating when I was a teenager, which was during the years where I didn't love myself, understand myself or value myself. I was still the life of the party, but in a way that simply screamed I needed attention. It was after I was raped, and i wanted desperately to feel wanted, beautiful, loved by someone.
I clung to the empty promises of these strangers like my life depended on it.
The flip side to this is, the vast majority of men I have encountered and even met from online dating have been emotionally scarred, crazy as hell or simply not at the stage where they want to settle down yet.
Like literally, ALL OF THEM! Or of course, they were catfish and I never figured out who they really were, or what they were really about.
Which makes for a simple case of delete the apps and stick to meeting people in person, right? Of course. I've deleted all of the apps a million times, and then in boredom slowly re-added them one by one.
I think it's an attention thing, a boredom thing and an overall "let's keep life interesting" thing. I don't get heartbroken over the sometimes crazy things weirdos say over the internet anymore, and I also don't believe all the buttery words guys try to feed me now.
I think 25 will be the year I resign from them all together, as the amount of crazies New York has been offering recently is getting out of control! I would never encourage anyone to date online, I think there are a lot of things lost when dating online vs. meeting someone in person and sparking up a conversation and building up the nerve to ask to exchange contact information.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on whether you've tried online dating, what you think of it or any really crazy "first and last dates" you've had!